There’s very clear and stark differences between humbly, actively, earnestly listening, respecting, making connections and building relationships and finding the resources already available and the educators, whether white or POC, self-appointed and compensated to help white people along in their journey and interrogating, antagonizing, demanding and expecting free education and tons of emotional evisceration and labor from communities of color exclusively for the entertainment and benefit of white people on their terms.
At the heart of it is the goal-do you want to learn for your own sake (reputation, financial gain, political or social success) only, or for the benefit and liberation of POC first and foremost? Are you invested emotionally, spiritually, financially etc in communities of color and their success or just stopping by to cry about being called racist? If you are POC focused and centered, you won’t attack or harass or demand or drain, but will walk in solidarity and support in a way that is beneficial to you and those communities.
No one expects or demands perfection, but after centuries of expecting us to do all the work (and for free!!) it’s time you actually put in the work yourselves and give to us instead.