Fuck You, I’m A Feminist Man, Now Fuck Me!
This is an old poem I wrote almost three years ago and posted on Tumblr about “male feminists”. Unfortunately many feminists, womanists, and other activists have been preyed upon by “male feminists” of the kind I describe in my poem. I wrote it at a time when I myself was getting targeted by an abusive ex-friend’s creepy white “male feminist” ex-boyfriend. We both kind of ended things with this person in the same year. He thought we could bond on hating our mutual ex together (though I knew they broke up because he abused of the boundaries of their open relationship and cheated, not just because my ex-friend was an abusive and difficult person). He sleazed on pictures of me on my blog describing sexual things he would do to me, would text me a lot and would try to always get me to ask for rides because I am carless, just a bunch of very adamant but lowkey/below the radar shit that made me uncomfortable. If I was friendly, he took that as interest, and if I was unresponsive, he took that as not appreciating his friendship. He seemed to specifically like me as an at the time very vulnerable person who ended a really toxic friendship with a best friend in a way that was super disturbing. The situation was yet another instance where an alleged “ally” or “male feminist” uses social justice language, community connections, friendship, kindess and bullshit farces just to get laid. I later found out he was hitting on a bunch of other QWOC/QPOC folks in my circle as well because of course, we compared notes. To say the least, it made me even more angry, cynical and tired than I already was of male leftist/social justice types, especially white ones, than I already was.
Content warning: Poem has graphic talk of misogynist sexual abuse, manipulation and harassment
I am entitled
to your body
because you’re a free
gets me off
and your identity
looks like it wants my dick.
You know what words
that both start with P?
Your Praxis and My Prick.
are of no consequence
unless they are a ‘yes’
then you’re so feminist
and I support you in that.
I want to fucking tie you up
and make you my slut
now call me daddy, bitch.
Hey, don’t worry
it’s just my kink!
Trust me, try it
you’ll like it,
it feels great!
The only thing
I need analyze and to unpack
is your body in those clothes.
you wanna fuck?
See, you agreed to it!
I know how to respect my partner’s wishes.
That’s all the people
you’ve slept with?
I thought you were sex positive,
that seems like a small number?
You’ve been with
THAT many people?
You’re letting them objectify and use you,
you’ve got some reflection to do.
Hey, I’ve got a Great Feminist Idea-Flash your boobs!
Hey, I’ve got a Great Feminist Idea-Save the boobs!
Hey, I’ve got a Great Feminist Idea-I’m free to talk about boobs!
Hey, I’ve got a Great Feminist Idea-Let me see your boobs!
The only progress I wanna make
is into your bed
Liberation from patriarchy matters
but why not liberate yourself from your fear of me?
Yeah, you’re only saying no
because you’re brainwashed by slut shaming.
If you were so feminist,
you’d fuck me, hard.
Those covered up women are oppressed
‘coz I can’t see their asses
because other men other than me
are dictating their bodies.
They should be good like the feminist girls I love
upstanding and proud
and on their knees
begging me to be freed from oppression.
We’re in an open relationship
so I can sexually harass other women
and my partner can’t say shit.
so I get two bitches at my disposal at times!
What!? You’re shaming me!
What!? You’re restricting my identity
What!? You won’t get any allies if you act like that.
What!? You’re too extreme.
What!? You’re just a fucking prude bitch.
Sex is all natural and healthy and good
So fuck you, I’m a Feminist Man, now Fuck Me.